This is Me, Lately

The beginning of the year yielded a lot of fatigue. After ten days at my mom's house, most of them snowed in, my goal of relaxation quickly turned to unrest. I had to start school the day after my staycation was over. Once classes started I remained mentally fatigued. An impending math class will do that to a person, especially when you are not a math person. I ended up making the decision to drop the class, feeling like a failure.

The other class, required for my degree, had mechanical problems from the beginning. That and the fatigue that refused to dissipate did not allow me to really jump feet first into my studies. An added letdown was that there was only one other student in the class, and he dropped out soon after, leaving me the lone student. In a history class, with a dull professor, this did not make a good mix. So, I dropped that class too, feeling even more like a failure. I registered for a mid-session course for another required course and did incredibly well. My academic self esteem boosted few notches upward.

In between school and vacations, I managed to do my taxes. This year was the first in several where I didn't owe the government. Instead, they owed me!

I want to become more politically proactive about an issue that affects me, but I don't want to delve into on a public forum. All I can say is that I am still stunned how much blatant discrimination is allowed right under the noses of certain governments.

I'm looking forward to the rest of the year. I have a lot ahead in terms of knocking things off my to-do list and getting life in order. It's April, and I need to start doing some spring cleaning of the mind.

My Sick Bed Calleth

Today, after a week long marathon session of coughing attacks, I admitted defeat and turned myself over to modern medicine. To be brutally honest, I only did so because I woke up this morning with that ailment we all know and love as 'pink eye'. That would definitely merit a doctor's visit. So, with barely much of a voice left, I made an appointment for both afflictions. Pink eye was confirmed on the spot, along with an edict as I was leaving afterwards that all rooms I had entered on the floor be detoxed due to "a patient with conjunctivitis". That would be little old me who ruined an nurse's day.

The bronchitis diagnosis was a shocker because I think the last time I had it was when I was a baby. I was also informed of having blood pressure just a tad on the low end and told to drink more fluids. I'm assuming that'll go back to normal after this passes and I can actually drink without coughing everything up! I was prescribed what is known as a Z-Pack to help both the bronchitis and the pink eye.

What pains me more is that my good friend D and his now fiancee, K, have come stateside to visit. I showed them around the city this past weekend with a voice that was barely audible and which cracked and gurgled at inopportune moments. Not fun for all.

By the end of the day, it hurts so much to cough that I do so with an open mouth, shots of saliva dotting the computer screen as I type. To have a coughing session with a closed mouth only forces my abdominal muscles to do double duty, and this pains me more.

I've been sick for quite some time now. Alarmingly so. It's been a shock to be in such a condition as this. I've canceled tons of plans and spent many weekends relaxing in hopes of recovering faster only to feel good for awhile then progress to horrible in a matter of days. I just want it all over and done with.

This is Me, Lately

I've been a very bad blogger lately. I've abandoned probably the two or three people who actually read this damn thing. So, it shouldn't come as a surprise to these relative few that I have been quite busy lately. I've just come down from a few big things, school and travel, and I'm a tired girl. I know the last one is a cop out, but since I've traveled to seven countries in three months, I have quite the excuse to wallow in a little bit of self pity. I finally released my posts about the Asia and Russia trips, over one and two months after I returned, along with a post including my thoughts about the election.

School finished up shortly before Christmas and I turned in a research paper I am very proud of. It's about the history and symbolism of the murals of Belfast, Northern Ireland. I was informed that I got A's in all my classes but that elation is momentary because starting Monday, I begin my algebra class. If there's one subject that boggles my mind, it's math. According to my transcripts, I need one more math class to satisfy my curriculum requirements. My grueling Statistics 101 class transferred over but according to the university, two algebra classes are needed in order to take a few of my statistical history courses.

Using the last of my time off, I scheduled a "staycation", and spent the past ten days at my mother's house lolling around doing nothing. The blizzard we had didn't help matters much and at times relaxation turned into cabin fever. Still, I got some retail therapy in, finally breaking down to buy some ice skates. I'm looking into taking classes soon.

Another thing. I'm toying with the idea of switching over to Wordpress. Who knows if/when that transition will occur, but it will have to be when I have enough down time.

8-8-8 A Day Not In Infamy

Today is supposed to be one of the luckiest days of the year. That is, according to the Chinese. For me, it was spent lamenting and getting anxious that nothing of permanent note was occurring for little old me. By permanent, I mean marriage, delivery of a baby, or anything else that would seal the deal, so to say, about the luckiness of this day.

I'm usually not reduced to hokum, except when it comes to numbers. Having numerical OCD doesn't help matters much. Especially when it's of the symmetrical variety. So, a day such as today gets me hopped up with anticipation of what might occur. Strange, I know.

Today, I did however, take advantage of a summer half-day Friday to stop into my doctor's office and either request an on-the-spot vaccination, or make an appointment for one. It was suggested that for the trip to Russia, I should get a combination diphtheria-tetanus shot. Turns out, they could take me and administer the vaccination. In addition, I was given full blood and urine tests and another appointment to return for possibly more vaccinations. Not that I was upset. It was good to get all of it out of the way. Regardless, my right arm should be sore for about a week or so.

To sum it up, 8-8-8 pretty much went bust for me, and was spent removing various fluids from my body in hopes that I will be healthy for 9-9-9, and beyond.

Eleven Years On

And I almost forgot.

It wasn't until last night when it occurred to me that today is my eleven year anniversary of moving to the city. I only realized this when during a conversation with one of our shelter guests, she revealed that she had once lived in the same residence I had when I first moved here.

Even more special is that today is the actual day, Sunday, when I arrived.

Another odd thing. This very residence is now a luxury hotel. My own friend will be staying there when she visits in a few weeks. I can't wait to go back and check out my old haunt.

Sew Focused

Yesterday, I participated in my first ever focus group. This was something that had been an interest of mine for years now, so anytime the opportunity presented itself, I would dutifully apply and hope to be accepted. Sometimes, it seemed like I was forever this close, but invariably one of my answers during the pre-interview would trigger that I wasn't in some way qualified for their study. However, as luck would have it in this particular case, being female and an intermediate sewer, I was finally a candidate!

I arrived early for the 5:30pm start, filled out the necessary paperwork, and took my place among seven other women. I don't recall if we were allowed to reveal the details of what transpired during the focus group. To be vague, it involved critiquing sewing product ideas for a well known person who happens to keep a tight rein on their empire. We were asked a ton of questions and for our personal opinions about product placement and celebrity endorsements.

We were also shown three television clips and asked to compare and contrast each of them. The comments and ideas flowed throughout us group of women and it was obvious that the moderator was pleased with our honest responses. That they provided cookies and refreshments only helped us settle in and relax a bit more. The entire discussion was filmed for them to review our responses later, but we were assured that it wouldn't end up on YouTube or anything like that, which was a relief!

The focus group lasted a little over an hour and a half. For our time, we were each handed $75 in cash at the end of the session. I think I'm liking this focus group stuff.

Bostonia, Again...

I swear I'm hanging around family too much. The last few trips to Boston were with my mother which, trying as it may have been at times, managed to be enjoyable. This past Easter weekend was no different, only there were two additions, my cousins. Because they hadn't been before, Friday, we took them into Boston, hopped the Red line, and situated them both on the Freedom Trail. Meanwhile, my mother and I headed to a cemetery in Roxbury to find a grave for her genealogy project. After we accomplished all that was needed, we headed back into Boston proper and met up with the others to finish out the remainder of the trail.

Leaving the North End, I was left with a feeling inside. It felt different, not tiring or frustrating, just a kinda sorta empty and longing feeling. More longing, actually. Then it all came full circle; Boston hasn't been explored on my own in well over ten years. It was all clear now. Each and every time I have visited it has been either with other travelers or for exclusive visits to people.

It's not like I have never had a great time. That's just the opposite. In fact, my impression of this city is only of fun and happiness, not to mention the youthful transgressions that still make my friends and I laugh reminiscing about them. What happened was I haven't, in a long time, given myself a mini solo trip, a chance to spread my wings again and be as unfettered and independent in what I believe to be, the second greatest city in the country.

The next and last day of our quick city jaunt, the group split up. My mother and cousins went to Fenway Park and I, all by my little lonesome, went to explore the campus of the university I will start attending this summer. Although I am a distant student and won't be campus bound for my education, I still have all the privileges afforded to me as if I were studying brick and mortar style. While there, it felt so good to relax, walk around, and take everything in stride. Aside from the excitement of seeing the campus, it confirmed the need for some Boston alone time. It also gave me a chance to breath and plot my next trip to the city, alone. Without a travel companion.

Hopefully, the next trip will be to come back, get my student ID, maybe purchase textbooks if classes happen to be starting then. That will be the business side of things. The rest will be a nice meal, some meandering around, maybe a T ride to some random destination. If she's available, perhaps I could meet up with H for some fun and always enjoyable times together. Something, anything, to return that piece of Bostonian freedom back inside my soul again.

I've Made It In!

I have been formally accepted into my college of choice!

I'm not surprised really, just happy that the process is finally over. I can wipe my brow and begin to worry about a whole other host of problems. I am still waiting for one set of transcripts to be sent. Afterwards, the college will give me an evaluation so I can choose the proper curriculum path. Until then, I won't know what classes will transfer over into my intended program. That is one of the worries.

What I'm really fretting over is the fact that I will have to take out student loans. A first for me. Since I'm attempting status as a full time student, my bank account won't hold up against the tuition demands. Luckily, I paid the first half of college out-of-pocket, which will help tremendously towards expenses. At my age, this is worrying me the most. As much as I realize that this is an important investment, the idea of being in my thirties with brand spankin' new student loans is proving to be very hard to confront. Day by day, I'm slowly talking myself down.

While I'm also seeking out scholarships and grants, I realize that I'm up against what feels like millions of other students who are vying for the same money. Besides, there are only so many original essays one can submit about how you're saving the world or what you've learned about ferrets in sub-Sahara Africa who are suffering from tuberculosis.

I shouldn't complain considering how lucky I am to even have these problems at all. Especially when so many don't even have the opportunities to further their education.